The Lift Hostess was an automated attendant aboard Red Dwarf's Xpress Lifts.

Recording Edit

When the crew of (a fully functional) Red Dwarf had to move quickly to a deck which was a long way above or below their current one, they used the high-speed Xpress Lifts. The lifts employed a virtual flight attendant to explain the safety procedures and entertainment, similar to Earth airliners.

She appeared as a pretty Human woman dressed in a stewardess uniform. She told the passengers how far they would be going, that they could enjoy an in-flight movie (Gone With The Wind) for a small extra charge and that there were no emergency exits if the lift crashed.

In the event of a crash landing, she explained that no-one would survive. In order to record their last will and testament, passengers would find a recording device under their seats, while above their heads they would receive a bag containing sedatives and cyanide pills. The Hostess then demonstrated how the suicide pills worked by opening one and placing it under her tongue. She keeled over immediately.

Lister found the Hostess and her safety demonstration extremely disconcerting. When they reached floor 16, she thanked the passengers for using Xpress Lifts and apologised for the delay. The Cat replied that she should apologise for the chicken meal, which tasted worse than the container in which it had been served.

It was left unclear whether the Hostess was a recording of a real woman or an artificial intelligence simulation. (RD: Stasis Leak )

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